Can They Spare It?

My good friend Janet is a master gardener. I am not, but I do love my flowers and herbs. I was thinking recently, however, that some things in life are just  plain disappointing. Take Montauk Daisies. Now, I have an emotional connection to them, as my family had a house in Amagansett, in the Hamptons for about 50 years, and Montauk Daisies are all over the place. So I have some here, and every spring I get excited to see them come up, with their abundant dark green foliage, and every late summer, I get annoyed that I have them. All the caretaking all summer, watering, etc., and a little daisy on the end of each stalk is all they can give me? Puhleeeze. Lillies of the Valley as well. Oh I know, people love the smell, but honestly, that's the best they can do? A bunch of little bells and all that greenery? It's not right, I'm telling you.

How about when you go to a bridal shower, or a baby shower? You bring a gift, all wrapped beautifully, a card, and on the way out you get some crappy butter mints wrapped in tulle. Plus, usually you have to play some ridiculous game at showers - and who started the tradition of the bride wearing the bows from all the gifts on her head? Some angry mother in law to be, would be my best guess. You go to the dentist, and you get a new toothbrush and some floss, at least that's pretty useful. You're going to need that equipment to get the butter mints out of your molars.